In 2014 Justin and I (Megan) hit the pause button quite a bit in our life. We paused from writing here, paused from involvement in extra groups and activities, paused from pressuring ourselves to be something or do something we didn’t believe would help us heal, grow or rejuvenate our soul. You see, 2014 was a year of incredible loss, grief and sorrow for us. With the loss of four family members and increasingly strained relationships, we knew the things we experienced were and had changed us but we needed time to catch up and respond to those changes.
I attended a conference which featured Geri Scazzero author of The Emotionally Healthy Woman. The great thing about attending a conference is the off chance that you are able to connect with or speak to the speaker. Geri was available to listen to my story for a few minutes and encouraged that silence would be an important part of moving forward. This just confirmed that indeed, hitting the pause button and taking extended times in reflective thought, prayer and silence was necessary for me.
Hitting the Pause button is not looked upon favorably in our culture. We are pressured to do more, be more, become more. Pausing seems counter intuitive to actually accomplishing anything. Taking a look at the most common new years resolutions would seem to prove that we are obsessed with doing more, setting lofty and often unattainable goals. While the underlining goals may well be positive and healthy, the pressure we add to our lives as a result is anything but.
I would like to suggest that maybe, just maybe, the healthiest thing you could do this year would be to pause more. Pause from the pressure to become more or do more. Pause from the expectations that you put on yourself and others. Pause from the insatiable need to figure it all out. There is no doubt that marriage takes work and effort. There are things, little things you can do each day to strengthen your marriage. However, great growth occurs when you regularly take time to pause. Pausing gives you time to reflect on what is working and what needs to be fine tuned. Pausing can provide just enough quiet and calm for you to hear your own thoughts. Consider how pausing on a regular basis could impact your life and your marriage.