13 Realities of Married Sex: #10 Sex is Freeing

The other day, Megan wrote that she sometimes suffers from “Stupid Stuff Syndrome”.  Well, I (Justin) occasionally suffer from “Complicated Schedule Syndrome”.  And when my schedule gets too full, I’m not the kind of guy that wants to attack it so it feels more manageable.  Instead, I just want to crawl into a dark room for a day or two and try not to think about anything.

Currently, my schedule is pretty complicated.  Our church of 500-600 attenders is weeks away from moving into our first real facility, where we anticipate that number going up.  Outside of work, I’m also working Taskdiligently towards receiving a Master’s Degree.  Quite honestly, the amount of reading I’m required to do is sometimes mind-boggling.  And through it all, I have a marriage to keep strong and 2 little girls who need their daddy.

I know I’m not the only one.  I’ve talked with dozens of people who live very complicated lives.

Get the kids up.

Get the kids fed.

Get the kids to school.

Get to work.

Get the task complete.

Get the meeting finished.

Get home.

Get the dishes done.

Get the homework complete.

Get… and the list keeps going.

I won’t lie, there are some moments when the to-do list is so long that the last thing on my mind is sex.  But Megan and I are strong believers that you have time for the things you make time for.  Not only that, but we firmly believe that you make time for the things that are most important.  Guess what?  We believe sex is important in a healthy marriage.

But sex isn’t just important, it’s also freeing.  No matter how busy your schedule gets, sex reminds you of what’s most important in life.  It erases the to-do list from your memory and instead places a “do-me” spouse right before your eyes.  It erases meaningless tasks and and replaces them with a moment that further cements your marriage.  Think about it:

In 5 years, that task will be completely forgotten, but your spouse will still be by your side.

In 10 years, that meeting will be history, but you’ll be thinking about your future with your spouse.

In 20 years, the children won’t need fed, but your spouse will still have an appetite for your body.

You see, sex reinforces that which is so important in life – that you and your spouse are in this together.  You’re not just there for one another, you’re with one another.  You’re connected.  You’re entwined.  You’re one.

So, when you experience seasons of extreme busyness, give your spouse the opportunity to set your to-do list aside.  And when they’re experiencing busyness, be sure to remind them to be free, too.

Linking with: To Love Honor and Vacuum & Messy Marriage

14 thoughts on “13 Realities of Married Sex: #10 Sex is Freeing

  1. oh, so true.
    the physical simplicity and deep symbolism of intimacy are such a needed reprieve in a world where we are often tempted to overestimate ourselves and the importance of our tasks.
    this is a beautiful blog. so glad i came over from messy marriage today. 🙂

  2. This is SO good. We try to remember this–together, we’re more important that homework/housework/whatever. And when life gets crazy, that’s when we need each other the most.

    Thanks for this reminder!!

  3. Amen! Kick that “to-do” list to the side and “do” your spouse! I love it, Justin! Thanks for bringing the male perspective into the mix on such a difficult topic for all of us–managing our time. Great thoughts and thanks for linking up with Wedded Wednesday! 🙂

  4. Pingback: Pearls and dust mites « up with marriage

  5. This is a great reminder to me. My to do list takes over often. Thanks for reminding me to add my husband to the “to do” list!

  6. You state “you make time for the things that are most important”
    Corollary: If you don’t make time, if you avoid it, it is Not important.

    Is it important? If so, do something about it. If it is not important, Repent.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s