Waves of pleasure, tension bursting, pure ecstasy…however you describe it, orgasm is amazing! For many women however, orgasm is quite elusive. Elusive enough that there are married women who rarely (or perhaps never) experience it. We want to talk bluntly today about the the topic of orgasm. There are many myths surrounding orgasm and today we will discuss three myths and some tips to overcoming them.
Myth Number 1: Orgasm just happens. Many women believe that sex, when done right, will automatically lead to orgasm. The consequence of believing this myth is that many women don’t think very highly of sex and receive very little pleasure from it. They don’t believe sex is being done right or, worse yet, that there is something wrong with them. Women, please understand, attaining regular and satisfying orgasms often takes practice and effort. So much so that many women do not achieve regular orgasms in the first few years of marriage. The mistake is that if a woman doesn’t believe orgasm(s) are possible during every sexual encounter she will quit trying to have them and become increasingly disinterested in sex.
Tip: Become a good student of your body and what works for you. Think about sex often, entice your husband to explore your body to find all your “hot spots” and focus attention on learning how to orgasm.
Myth Number 2: Penetration is necessary for orgasm. This may or may not be true for you. Women need to understand what works for them and then ask their husband to please them in that way. Looking at the physical anatomy of the female body, it is completely possible for the clitoris to be stimulated without their husband ever entering them.
Tip: Understand and learn to communicate about where you like to be touched, how you like to be touched (ie. softer, harder, slower, faster, etc.). Experiment to see what ways other than penetration your partner can use to bring you to climax. Penetration is not necessary for orgasm and most women find much satisfaction without it.
Myth Number 3: It is selfish of me to want an orgasm every time we make love. This is a myth that is in and of itself selfish. As husbands and wives God has given each of us an obligation to look out for the benefit of our spouse. We are to sacrifice and give of ourselves to please them. It is not a selfish desire to want to experience a higher level of intimacy and satisfaction in your sex life.
Tip: Talk to your husband about your desire to learn how to orgasm or experience multiple orgasms. You just may be surprised at how willing he is to see you climax and be fully satisfied. In fact, many men find that there is more satisfaction in pleasuring their wives than in seeking their own pleasure. Work at it, practice it and then just ride the wave….maybe even multiple times!
Have any questions about these myths, or potential other ones? Feel free to let us know in the comments below.